Chapter V
Harry disapparated at dawn. He landed neatly in front of Hog's Head and heard the familiar voice of Aberforth.
"Potter! Why on earth are you popping in here so early?"
Aberforth was leaning against the doorway of his bar, smoking a long pipe and looking as grumpy as ever.
"Good morning Mr. Dumbledore. I'm visiting Hogwarts."
"What do you mean visiting Hogwarts? Aren't you still in Hogwarts?" Asked Aberforth moodily.
"Ah! We didn't return after the war. I thought everyone knew..."
"I lost my inside guy!" Growled Aberforth "And I don't have student clientele!"
Harry understood that by "inside guy" he meant, Dumbledore, his brother.
"I see! How are things? Back to normal?" Asked Harry, trying to make a polite small talk.
"As normal as humanly bearable" Grunted Aberforth "But why are you here boy? And why do you look so unnerved?" Aberforth's bright blue eyes were staring right into Harry's eyes. The uncanny resemblance and the familiar sensation of being X-rayed unsettled Harry.
"I'm fine, I'm meeting an old friend, that's all!" Harry replied a little too hastily.
"Is that so? Even the birds are still asleep! Do you want to catch her off-guard?"
"When did I say it's a girl?" Harry asked defensively.
"You didn't have to!" Smirked Aberforth "I'm a barman! Come inside, I'll give you a drink!"
And with that, Aberforth went back inside his bar and left the door open for Harry.
Harry considered for a moment, did he want to give him 'girl advice'? It was too early for any drink anyway, but he was right, even the birds weren't even chirping yet. It was too early. Harry only left so early because he didn't want to face Hermione about his decision. "Well this was as good a pass-time as any!" Harry thought to himself.
He entered the Hog's Head and sat across Aberforth who passed him a deep purple-ish drink, in a mug that had the dirt of centuries on it.
"Thanks!" Mumbled Harry.
"Look I'm not gonna give you any advice, but I'll say just this, whatever you're thinking or feeling right now, probably doesn't matter in the long run."
Said Aberforth abruptly.
"Excuse me?" Was all that Harry could get out in response to this strange statement.
"You heard me, whatever you're feel..."
"Yea I got that thanks! But it doesn't mean anything to me right now!" Harry cut him off irritably.
"Hasn't the war thought you anything? Hasn't it thought you to see the bigger picture? To see ahead?" Retorted Aberforth, clearly not taking kindly to being cut-off mid-sentence.
"What does that have to do with anything? I'm just meeting a friend, that's all. It's not that deep!" Harry scowled as he said the last words.
There was silence then, for a few minutes there was only the sound of glass against wood and slow burning of dry tobacco. Harry considered the possibility that his appearance had given away enough of his intention that Aberforth managed to guess what was going on with him. He probably thought it's a passing wartime romance that faded away post-war or something stupid like that.
"I heard there were death eater sightings here!" Harry said casually.
"And we sent them to the ministry in chains!" Replied Aberforth proudly.
"Why can't the ministry round them up? Why are they roaming freely after all they've done!"
"The ministry has other worries. For one, finding spies and death eater sympathizers inside the ministry. Their main concern right now is who will rise to power! It is nothing new, they all have some excuse for helping the dark lord!"
"I bet they're all pleading the imperious!" Said Harry bitterly. "While everyone is busy with bureaucracy and politics!" He added.
"They are if they know they can get away with it, and politics remain politics! Nothing new!"
"And can they? I bet the Malfoys can!"
"Some manage it, others not so much. The Malfoys hearing is this week. Don't you read the papers?"
"No! I stopped reading them, they make my blood boil. The crap they print!" Harry responded angrily.
"Well they've always printed crap, but it's the crap that is happening, and we must remain informed!"
"I guess you're right!"
"The school should be properly awake now" Said Aberforth, not sounding like he wanted to get rid of him, just politely informative.
"I'll take my leave then!" Replied Harry and stood up.
"I'd postpone that meeting!" Said Aberforth, his eyes peering into his again.
"I've postponed it for months, I have to get it over with!" Harry said, more to himself than to Aberforth. "Besides you don't even know what's going on, no offense!"
"I'm a barman boy! Do you know how many men have sat across me with that same look on their face over the past 50 years?" Aberforth almost roared.
"I can't keep her safe!" Harry Said before he could stop himself. "I can't keep any of them safe!"
Harry started to pace up and down the bar.
"You don't have to!" Said Aberforth a little more gently but still in his grunting broody voice.
"Of course I have to!"
"No you don't have to keep everyone safe personally. We have a society for that!"
"And how has that been working out for us?" Retorted Harry.
"Not too well of late, but we are getting there again!" replied Aberforth darkly.
"Yea right!"
"People are more supportive of each other now, we've got each others back!"
"And how long will this newly found courage last? Until the next dark lord? The first outlaw to cast a dark spell? How about the next war? Or the first politician who manages to rally them into the next doom?" Harry asked angrily.
"What do you expect? War changes things! People more than all! But the war is over, and we are re-building a society once again. You better trust it and try to be a part of it, or you'll be an outcast, a remnant of the bitter days of war!"
He continued when Harry didn't say anything.
"I am only telling you to not make my mistake. Nothing seems important after a war and people make rash and dumb decisions that they end up regretting. That's it!" He turned to leave "And that's on the house" He said nodding at Harry's drink before he vanished into the dark room behind the bar.
Harry didn't even try to call for him or say anything. He finished his drink and left in silence. As he walked up the hill that led to Hogwarts, he thought about what Aberforth had said. There was some truth to it, but it didn't apply to Harry's situation. More importantly, it was advice that Harry hadn't asked for. He was getting sick of people handing him free advice. "Just serve you stupid drinks and shut up!" Harry thought to himself as he kicked the ground beneath his feet.
Harry reached the edge of the wards and the gate which was chained and magically shut. The wards felt odd on his skin. They felt stronger, or just different. He realized that he hadn't given the Hogwarts wards much thought before. He reached out and touched the gate, hoping that it would react to him, to know a student or someone who cared for this place, but the gate remained shut and un-moving.
Harry held his wand and pointed it towards the headmaster's, now the headmaster's tower."Expecto Patronum". His large silver stag burst out of his wand and stood proudly before him for a second before charging at the castle. Harry had instructed the stag to deliver a message. This was unique to the order members and devised by Dumbledore himself and of course, it had to be done wordlessly.
Seconds later, as headmistress McGonagall drew on her gown, the large silver stag burst through the wall and stood before her, speaking in Potter's voice. "Headmistress, this is Harry Potter, I request permission to enter the Hogwarts grounds, I am standing by the Hogsmeade gate."
Minerva McGonagall flicked her wand and sent a response back with superb skill. She would fetch potter personally. "Typical! The sort of thing James would do, just popping at the gate and asking to enter!" She rolled her eyes. It was just too early in the morning and Potter has never been a morning person, something was wrong.
The silver cat stood before Harry and spoke in Minerva McGonagall's voice "Good morning Potter, I shall be with you as soon as possible!"
She could have just lifted the wards, or send Filtch or Hagrid, now to think of it he could have just sent the patronus to Hagrid! He smacked himself across the forehead. Why is she coming to get me personally?!
A few minutes later, professor McGonagall was pasting steadily towards him and with a superior wand gesture, she lifted the wards and opened the gates.
"Good morning Potter, Welcome home!"
"Thank you headmistress, I am sorry to bother you this early in the morning!"
"No trouble Potter, life starts early at Hogwarts. Shall I accompany you to the great hall? We are just about to have breakfast!"
"I understand this is very early professor, I should have sent an owl!"
"That would have been welcomed Potter!"
They were walking past Hagrid's hut now, Harry struggling to keep up with her long steps.
"I see that most of the school has been renovated professor!"
"Indeed, it has been hard work and much still remains, but surely you have not come all the way from London to comment on our progress Potter!"
"No mam, I am here to visit a friend and to discuss the continuation of our education with you!"
"The continuation of your education..." She repeated vaguely.
"I mean Ron, Hermione and myself professor!"
"Why are you so formal Potter?" She asked abruptly, pausing in her stride to look at him full in the face. They were standing at the entrance of the great hall now.
"Why are you so tense? What has happened to you?" She pressed on.
"I... I'm fine professor... I just need to see a friend and to take a few minutes of your time afterwards, whenever you have time of course." Harry added politely.
"I see. Seventh years have transfiguration at 9 am sharp with me, there should be more than enough time to discuss whatever you need to discuss with whomever you need to discuss it!"
"Yes professor, that's enough!"
"Well Potter, do what you must and meet me after my class!"
"So you are still teaching transfiguration professor?"
"I'm afraid so, good luck on your meeting Potter!" She turned to leave in the direction of the staff table "And Potter!" She added.
"Yes professor?"
"She can't be late for my class!" She added with an uncharacteristic smirk.
"Yes professor!" Harry muttered grudgingly.
Harry found Ginny in the great hall, sitting at the Gryffindor table. The Gryffindor table was not yet crowded by students. Besides Ginny there were a few first and second year students, eating their breakfast with their eyes still closed. Harry didn't see any familiar faces as he stood directly behind Ginny. This was an advantage since the last thing that he wanted, was to make a scene at the break of dawn at Hogwarts.
"Hi!" Harry said gently behind Ginny.
"Harry!"
Ginny screamed and launched herself at him and hugged him. A few students cat whistled across the hall, but Harry couldn't care less. Ginny let go of him as quickly as she had hugged him.
"Hi Ginny!" Harry smiled at her.
"W... What are you doing here Harry?"
"I'm here to see you of course!" Harry said with a laugh. "I'll wait for you to finish eating OK?"
"NO! I mean, I've already eaten!"
This was a lie since Harry could see her plate was still pretty full of sausages and eggs.
"There is no rush, I have all the time in the world!" Harry said gently as he saw her blush at her blunder.
"No really Harry, I ate enough, do you want to sit?"
"I thought maybe we take a walk, you know, before your class?"
"Oh to hell with my class!" Ginny snorted.
"Don't let McGonagall hear that!" Harry replied as he guided her towards the exit and to the grounds.
Harry had been dreading this moment for months, but now that he was next to her, he remembered how easy it was to talk to her. How pleasant it was to be close to her and how stunningly beautiful she was, even now that she was practically straight out of bed. Her reddish brown hair glittered in the sunlight, and she seemed to radiate with beauty and affection.
They walked until the edge of the lake in silence. It was Ginny that broke the silence once they slowed down their pace, walking around the edge of the lake.
"I don't understand you Harry, you ignore me for months, you don't reply to my mail, you don't send words or anything, and then you suddenly appear behind me at Hogwarts!"
"I wasn't ignoring you Ginny!"
"Oh yea, Ron said you don't open mail anymore!" Ginny cut him off skeptically.
"Well yea, but I didn't know what to write anyway even if I had opened them!"
"I don't know, yes everything is alright here, Hermione says hi, I miss you. Or any other normal thing!"
Harry could only pick up the hurt in her voice. It made him ashamed of himself.
"You did miss me, didn't you?" She paused in her track, looking into Harry's eyes. They were quite far from the castle now, they had walked all the way to the other side of the lake.
"Of course I did Ginny. I missed you like hell, like you have no idea, but I didn't know what to say or how to say it and when to say it and whether to sound casual as if it's all OK now or to say something deep and romantic or to make it clear that I want us to be back together or that it isn't necessary because we are already together! It was just too much Ginny, please try to understand." Harry gasped for air as he finished that sentence.
"Well that's just silly!" Scolded Ginny, but she sounded amused.
"Yea well that's me, silly Harry Potter!"
"I didn't mean it like that, I mean, clearly... Never mind..."
"What is it?"
"Well clearly there has been another contributing factor that made all those questions unimportant!"
Harry gaped at her for a second.
"Is everybody a legilimens today?" Harry asked sarcastically.
"Who else have you seen today?" Ginny asked curiously.
"Aberforth and McGonagall!"
"Ouch! They read your mind?" Ginny smirked.
"No, but they both seemed to know I was going to see a girl!" Harry shrugged.
"Well you must have been awfully obvious!"
"No I wasn't, I was very normal!"
"Harry, subtlety has never been one of your talents!" Ginny teased.
"Thanks for that Ginny!" Harry replied a little hurt.
"Oh don't frown at me!"
"I'm not frowning!"
"You're evading my very strong and apparently correct suspicion. What was it that made all those thoughts less important?" She hesitated "Is there someone else?"
"NO!" Harry cut her off before she could get the full question out "Definitely no!"
"Then what is it Harry?" She asked gently "don't you love me anymore?"
"Ginny of course I do, How can you doubt that?"
"Well then what is it?" She asked impatiently.
"I... I don't want to make you a target for anyone who might try to get back at me!" Harry spluttered rapidly, as if getting it out faster made it less stupid.
"Sorry? The war is over Harry, He is gone, death eaters are being rounded up one by one, Hogwarts is as safe as ever!"
"I know..." Moaned Harry. "But is it really over?"
"What do you mean?"
"It feels like we are just living between wars, it feels wrong, this peace, this rebuilding a society bullshit, It all feels wrong, it feels fake!" Harry exclaimed angrily.
"So you feel like you can't protect me?"
"Yes." Harry replied shamelessly.
"And do I look like a helpless little kitten that needs protecting around the clock Mr. Potter?" Ginny asked with a smirk.
"It isn't a laughing matter Ginny!" Harry snapped.
"NO IT IS NOT! Because in case you forgot, I fought in the war, I fought the Carrows, I came with you to the ministry and fought death eaters. Have you lost your memory Harry Potter?" She roared.
Harry was slightly taken aback, although this reaction was not entirely unexpected.
"No I have not forgotten Ginny, you're tough, I know it, I love that in you, but I can't have it on my conscious that it was I who put a bullseye on your back!"
"And I don't get a say in this? Maybe I think bullseyes look good on my back!"
"Ginny-" Harry began but was cut off.
"Has Ron poisoned your mind with this rubbish?" She asked abruptly, crossing her arms.
"What? No, He was actually bugging me for ignoring you!"
"Hmm." she huffed.
"So that's it then, I'm a helpless little kitten and Harry Potter cannot be bothered with my safety?"
"No Ginny, it's not like that, I swear I would give anything to be with you again, and I would die to protect you..."
"Be quiet!" Ginny whispered, hiding a sob.
"... I'd rather die a hundred times and never see you get as much as a scratch..." Harry continued a little softer, being taken aback by Ginny's sudden change of tone.
"Be quiet!" Ginny screamed this time.
"Excuse me?" Harry began, offended, but she grabbed the collar of his robes and kissed him. Harry was defused as the feel of her soft lips, the scent of her hair engulfed his entire world. He held her close to himself in a tight embrace, he could feel her heart beating fast against his chest as he kissed her passionately. It felt like several years could pass, the world could end, and he wouldn't have known. When they broke apart, after what felt like a lifetime, Harry starred into her amber eyes, and she into his emerald green ones and they both chuckled and kissed again.
"You are not getting rid of me Harry Potter!"
"I... I don't object!" And he truly didn't.
"I... I still have nightmares, about the war, about Fred, about Hagrid, carrying your dead body..." She said, looking away from Harry's face as tears filled her eyes. "I'm never free from it! And I don't think that you are either!" And she broke into tears, it was quite hysteric. In his panic, Harry hugged her and tried to mumble words of comfort, but she kept sobbing into his robes. It took her several minutes before she could speak again.
"I saw your dead body Harry, and my world ended, I was ready to die in an attempt to avenge you right there and then, I didn't care!"
"But I didn't die Ginny, Even in Hagrid's arms, I wasn't dead!"
"What if you had? You say you can't protect me, but it was I who could never protect you! You were out there in god knows where doing god knows what, and you weren't safe and everyday I thought what I would do if in the morning the prophet wrote that you were killed! You don't know how hard it was Harry, not knowing, and then you came back, and I saw that you were OK, that there is hope, that it all might end up fine after all, only to see your dead body a few hours later!"
She started sobbing again. Harry only now realized how hurtful and traumatizing the whole affair must have been for her. He was so busy worrying about everything else that he completely overlooked the possibility that Ginny would have been worried sick for him for a year. He felt selfish and short-sighted.
"Ginny, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry I put you through that, I really am!"
"So don't give me this self-righteous nonsense about protecting me. Even if a death eater gets me in the back with an avadakedavra..."
"Don't say that!" Harry cut her off quickly.
"Why not?" She asked with teary eyes.
"Because you don't have my permission to die!" Harry said with a smile.
There was a pause before Ginny chuckled.
"You don't have my permission to die either Harry Potter!" Ginny said with a smile.
"I promise you that I have no plans to die whatsoever!"
"Good. Because if you died on me Harry, I'd kill you myself!"
"Romantic" Harry smirked, and they kissed again, and walked hand in hand one more time around the lake and back towards the castle. The hour stretched as they walked. Ginny showing him the renovated sites and telling him about silly mistakes that they have made and that some students put their initials into the bricks and stones that they were working with. Harry listened to her, enchanted by her voice and her energy. He had forgotten how much he loved her. He disapparated from Grimmauld with the understanding that it was best for the both of them to break up, but now, he wouldn't break up with her even if she wanted it.
"Oh damn, your transfiguration class!"
"What about it?"
"McGonagall will kill me if you're late!"
"There is still time, I could make it, but I'd rather take this entire day off and just wander around the ground with you!"
"Me too Ginny but seriously, McGonagall will have my head. She knew I was meeting you!"
"Nosy cat!" She hissed.
"I have the rest of the day to myself, I just have to see McGonagall for a few minutes after the class, then you can ditch all the rest of your classes, and maybe we walk a bit more, and catch up?"
"Yea catch up!" She smirked "Don't leave without saying bye, OK?"
"Wouldn't dream of it." Harry smiled back.
And with that and another kiss, Ginny left to grab her books and attend her class while Harry sat under an oak tree in a dreamy haze, waiting for her class to finish. He felt oddly weightless. As if the burden of not knowing his future with Ginny was weighting him down over the past months, without him realizing it. As he laid there, a thought occurred to him. He could visit the library and see if he can find something on soul magic. He could possibly discuss the matter with Flitwick, he was after all a superb charms expert and trinity charm, well it was a charm. Harry considered for a moment. It wouldn't do to reveal his sudden interest in the illegal field of soul magic to a Hogwarts professor and an order member. No, he would see what he can find in the library first.
An hour later, he approached the empty transfiguration classroom. Ginny was standing at the doorway, talking to Luna.
"Hi Luna, How are you?" Harry asked.
"Oh I'm great Harry, Have you come to stay?" Luna inquired.
"No Luna I just needed to take care of a few things, then I'll be going back."
"Do you mean Ginny when you say take care of things? I find that odd since she is not a thing." Luna asked dreamily.
"Um... No I mean I need to talk to McGonagall and..." He paused with a sideways look at Ginny who was smirking at him.
"I understand, Good to see you Harry." And then she turned to Ginny. "I'll leave you then, Harry wants to take care of you Ginny."
"Oh Luna not so loudly!" Hissed Ginny as Luna waved her goodbye and left.
"Um I guess I'll talk to McGonagall now." Harry said awkwardly.
"I'll wait for you to come and take care of me then." Ginny giggled.
Harry smirked and left before he got red in the face. He knocked and was told to enter.
It was well into the night, when Harry returned to Grimmauld place. He had a thorough conversation with professor McGonagall about how they were going to continue their studies and prepare for the NEWTs. Harry asked her to consider allowing them to study on their own and only take the exams at Hogwarts. She had frowned at the suggestion at first, but after Harry gave her a dramatic speech about bad memories and trauma, she had softened and promised to consider the matter and get back to them by owl.
The rest of the day was spent with Ginny, but it wasn't until after the dinner that they finally managed to have a few private minutes. Everyone was excited to see Harry Potter back at the school. Dean, Seamus, Parvati and the rest of Gryffindor house just would not let go of Harry.
They made so much noise that professor McGonagall had to tell them off for disrupting the peace, but she only did so half-heatedly.
Harry had an enjoyable hour with Ginny after dinner. Walking the grounds and empty corridors like they did before. Harry had finally kissed Ginny good night outside the portrait of the fat lady, and promised to write as often as he had anything worthy to say. His only regret was not having managed to see Hagrid as he was spending the day with his giant brother up in the mountains and hadn't returned yet.
Harry disapparated right outside the wards and appeared at Grimmauld place's doorstep with a loud crack. They still hadn't managed to remove the portrait of Mrs. Black, but they had undone the enchantments that rolled their tongues back as they entered. Undoing the dusty Dumbledore ghost hadn't been much of a challenge, actually.
Harry stepped into the kitchen where he found his two best friends, who were sitting around the table, sipping tea. The atmosphere was oddly tense between them. The air was thick with tension and worry.
"Hi..." Harry said a little uncertainly. "Erm what's wrong?"
"Where were you Harry?" Hermione inquired angrily, slamming down her cup of tea.
"At Hogwarts, didn't Ron tell you?"
"You left at the crack of dawn mate, and it's 10 pm!"
"Well I didn't think I ought to return immediately after!"
"We were worried sick Harry! What happened at Hogwarts? What happened with Ginny?"
"Nothing happened Hermione, we are fine!"
"I bet you thought you were being real romantic and spontaneous! This is exactly the sort of behavior that girls hate! It doesn't spark trust and stability! You can't just pop in front of her after months of ignoring her! Do you have any idea how she must have felt! If you had told me, I would be able to help you but now that you have ruined it for yourself..."
Hermione seemed to go on and on and on. Harry looked at Ron with his mouth open. Ron shrugged as if saying "I don't know mate, it's beyond me.". She kept going on, talking fast and reprimanding him. It wasn't until Harry shouted her name that she became momentarily silent in indignation, and Harry took his chance.
"Hermoine will you calm down! We are fine, I spent the whole day with her. We are great, actually. What has gotten into you?"
"You are fine?" Hermione whispered.
"Yes fine, why wouldn't we be?"
"Then why are you so late?" Hermione rallied right back.
"What does that have to do with anything? Dean and Seamus wouldn't let me go, so I stayed for dinner, and then we took a little walk with Ginny" Harry Explained. "Outside!" Harry added quickly.
"Oh!" Hermione muttered a little ashamed.
"Yea!" Harry replied coldly.
"Well we thought that you two had a fight, and you're wandering dark alleys and streets or maybe gone somewhere and gotten drunk!" Hermione said quickly, with plea in her voice.
"What?" Harry said in disbelief. "Wandering dark alleys and getting drunk? Did you just meet me?" He turned to Ron "What is this?"
"I... Well I was sure you left to break up. I saw you in the morning, you looked like hell Harry no offense, and then you didn't come back, and you didn't send word so we thought you must be in a terrible mood." Ron explained.
"That, is, really stupid" Harry said though gritted teeth.
"And what is this about me being not good enough for ‘girls'?" Harry put extra stress on the word ‘girls'.
"That's not what I meant!" Hermione said as she got red in the face.
"I was sure I heard you say it." Harry replied coldly.
"No I was pointing out a general misbelief that boys seem to have that doing sudden things is romantic. They are, but not always." Hermione looked away from him. "And you are more than good enough for any girl!" Hermione finished as she got even redder in the face and Ron shifted a little in his chair.
Harry put a hand through his hair and sat down.
"Guys I'm in an excellent mood and don't want to fight. I'm sorry if my absence worried you, but you should have never assumed I'd go ‘wander the dark and get drunk'!"
"I'm still mad at you for not confiding in me Harry!" Hermione said and folded her arms.
"That's fine!" Harry said gently.
"No it's not! Do you not trust me?" Hermione said, Flaring up instantly.
"Hermione this is exactly why I left before even the god-damn birds started to sing. I don't want a sermon and I know how to handle my relationship, if I ever need advice, trust me, you'd be the first person I'd confide in!" Harry finished with a smile.
"Fine!" Hermione said in a whisper. "I can't stay mad at you since you made it up with Ginny!"
"So what happened?" Ron asked.
"I had a chat with Ginny, and we decided that neither one of us is getting rid of the other one anytime soon!" Harry said with a grin.
"That doesn't sound healthy." Said Hermione, unfolding her arms.
"It's not like that Hermione, we are happy." Harry replied reassuringly.
"Well if you're happy..." Hermione sighed.
"Excellent!" Ron exclaimed.
Harry and Hermione both turned to look at him in surprise.
"What? Can't I be happy for my sister and my best mate?" Ron asked in defense.
They shared a short laugh and Hermione got up to make some more tea.
"Oh I forgot! I asked McGonagall to let us study here and only go to school for the NEWT exams."
"What did she say?" Hermione asked anxiously.
"She didn't like it at first, but then I told her about how I see death everywhere I look in the castle and that you two feel the same and she sort of softened up and promised to consider it and reply by owl." Harry explained.
"You didn't actually tell her that you see death all around the castle did you?" Ron asked uncertainly.
"Um, I did, and it's not a lie, I may have added a few pauses and stutters for dramatic effect, but if it wasn't for Ginny, I'd rather never set foot in that castle ever again. At least not until its properly renovated" Harry explained, looking intently at his tea cup.
"Oh Harry..." Sighed Hermione as she reached out to touch his hand gently and gave it an affectionate squeeze.
"I kept having flashbacks anywhere I looked. Honestly if I wasn't so distracted by Ginny and then everyone else, I don't know if I could've handled it."
"Mate... We could have gone with you, you know..." Said Ron after a pause.
"I know." Replied Harry, finally looking up. "But I didn't want to drag you into it, we all know why we didn't go back and its no secret. I still have nightmares, and I'm sure you do too. You guys have each other and I, well I'm fine when I'm busy." Harry ended with a shrug.
"Harry... You have us too!" Hermione said in a gentle whisper and Ron nodded in affirmation.
Harry squeezed her hand and gave Ron a nod.
"I know guys, I know."
They sat there in silence for a couple of minutes. Ron left to write a letter to Mrs. Weasley about Harry and Ginny having made up and left Harry and Hermione in the kitchen. Once their tea kettle was empty, and they couldn't hide under the pretense of quietly drinking tea, Hermione spoke.
"I looked up trinity Harry."
Harry made a throaty sound to imply that he was listening and Hermione continued.
"It is really complicated and requires practice."
Harry nodded, allowing her to continue.
"Harry I don't know if I'm the right person for this sort of thing! What if I get carried away or lose control or focus and I end up killing all of us or worst, damaging our souls?" Hermione finished breathlessly.
"Hermione, You're the brightest, most talented witch I've ever known. If anyone can do it, it's you." Harry said as he grabbed her hands in his. "Besides, I wouldn't trust anyone else with my life and soul." Harry finished with a smile.
"Promise me one thing Harry."
"Anything!" Harry replied. "During the ritual, at the beginning, just after our souls connect, there is a part where you have to let me in. Promise me that if I wanted to stop, you won't drag me in, I wouldn't be able to control myself and... And..." She trailed off.
"I'll stop, I'll stop the moment you say so! I won't make you carry on, I promise!" Harry reassured her.
"Thank you!" Hermione sighed and gently withdrew her hand from his.
"I still think someone should watch over us as we do it!" Hermione continued.
"Who? We don't have anyone Hermione, it's just the three of us, like always!"
"Well I thought Mrs. Weasley could... Maybe..." Hermione replied uncertainly.
Ron came back into the kitchen at that very moment, just as Harry snorted.
"Yea she would be very understanding of our actions!" Harry said.
"What, you're not thinking about telling my mom about the ritual, are you Hermione?" Ron asked alerted.
"No I just thought if someone was to watch over us, she would be a great candidate." Hermione responded quickly.
"Yea a great candidate to assassinate the three of us!" Ron continued in an uncanny imitation of his mother.
"SOUL MAGIC! NEVER IN MY LIFE HAVE I IMAGINED MY CHILDREN DELVING INTO SUCH FOUL MAGIC. YOUR FATHER IS IN THE MINISTRY! DO YOU HAVE ANY CONSIDERATION FOR YOU FATHER'S REPUTATION RONALD WEASLEY!"
He turned to face Hermione as they both laughed loudly.
"AND YOU MISS! I MAY NOT BE YOUR MOTHER BUT I DARE SAY IF YOU STEP ONE TOE INTO SOUL MAGIC I'LL GROUND YOU MYSELF, MY DAUGHTER OR NOT YOU ARE NOT DOING THIS!"
Hermione looked both amused and scared at the same time as she laughed anxiously.
"AND YOU MISTER BOY WHO LIVED! I DON'T CARE HOW MANY TIMES YOU EVADED DEATH! IF YOU GET INTO THIS SORT OF MAGIC I SWEAR TO MERLIN I'LL SHOW YOU THAT YOU ARE NOT IMMORTAL!"
Ron finished and joined the laughter himself.
"Seriously she'll kill us all, then it won't matter what kind of soul you have Harry!" Ron said in between his laughs.
Once the laughter died out, after several minutes. Harry asked Ron about the letter he had just sent.
"Oh I just said that you two are in a toxic relationship, but you're both gits, so you're happy about it and we should be happy for you as well." Ron replied with a smirk.
"Ron!" Hermione exclaimed.
"She'll be here in the morning then!" Harry said with a laugh.
"Ron you didn't say that did you?" Hermione asked seriously.
"No Hermione I'm not an idiot!" Ron responded a little offended.
"I just told her that Harry has spoken to Ginny, and they are happily back together and everything is fine, and we might be able to take NEWTs without doing the whole year again, that's all!" Ron finished.
"Oh, good then." Hermione replied in relief.
Ron mouthed "good then!" behind her to Harry and Harry had to hide a chortle.
"How about Bill?" Hermione asked abruptly.
"What about him?" Asked Ron and Harry together.
"What if Bill supervised the ritual? He's a curse breaker, he should have experience with this sort of magic." Hermione urged.
"Hermione, if you really want someone older to watch over us during the ritual, Bill is not a good choice. Bill is cool, yea, he'd probably even understand our reasons, but Bill, well Bill is Bill. He's older and more rational. He's not like Percy, but he's not Fred and George either."
Ron seemed to change color as Fred's name slipped from his lips and he looked at them as if daring them to correct him that there is only George now.
"Well then we won't do anything until I'm comfortable with the whole thing." Hermione said crossly.
"We won't do anything until you're ready Hermione, don't worry. There is no rush." Harry reassured her.
"Dad might actually be OK with it!" Ron said, more to himself.
"Really?" Asked Hermione in surprise.
"Dad is actually really powerful you know. I overheard kingsly and Tonks talking about him last summer. Kingsly reckoned dad could probably duel half the order at once and hold his end. He said Arthur can pull off magic that even he can't! It's a shame that he wastes time with all that muggle crap to be honest with you all!"
"You think he'd help us?" Asked Harry.
"I mean, he won't rat us out to mom even if he doesn't help." Ron shrugged.
"Are you sure Ron? I know that Mr. Weasley is a capable wizard, but we don't need telling off you know." Hermione said hesitantly.
"I'll bring him over for lunch tomorrow, and we'll throw some hints at him about the ritual and see his reaction, then we'll decide to tell him or not, how's that?" Ron asked excitedly.
"That sounds fine." Said Harry.
"Well alright!" Said Hermione sounding still a little uncertain.
"I better sleep if I'm going to the ministry tomorrow." Said Ron as he got up. "Why are you going to the ministry?" Asked Harry.
"Because... Well its better this way, I'll bring him along with me."